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Who am I????
Friday, August 15, 2014 at 10:32 PM
I'm not sure what's wrong with me. Am I loved enough? Or is it because we don't come across in the same manner? I was okay until this happened. Am I this weak? This easy to break? Are may convictions not as strong as I thought they were?
Most of the time I want to be alone... I want my space, I want my space to think and fill up the space with my words. I don't feel as loved as I was before... I don't think someone is capable of being crazily in love with me... I can't stun people the same way beautiful women can... And if I stun someone with my mind, it's always never genuine... They are drawn to me only for a while... What am I gonna do???? I don't know why I let myself swim in convenient attention... Am I that thirsty of a love I think I deserve? And when the love comes, I push it away because I think I am not worthy? So many thoughts are running in my head and I am having hard time trying to grasp all the ideas closing in on me... All the feelings I try to bury inside me... I am scared of people taking it out and making me see... That it is me... I'm in the wrong... I am overwhelmed... To the point that I can't take everything in... I'm scared to look weak... Because I have to be strong for people... Can someone help me???? I feel so useless... How come even if I try hard to be good.... No one still sees the good I try to be??? How come it's never enough??? Who am I really?????? Help me... |
“In most books, the I, or first person, is omitted; in this it will be retained; that, in respect to egotism, is the main difference. We commonly do not remember that it is, after all, always the first person that is speaking. I should not talk so much about myself if there were anybody else whom I knew as well. Unfortunately, I am confined to this theme by the narrowness of my experience. Moreover, I, on my side, require of every writer, first or last, a simple and sincere account of his own life, and not merely what he has heard of other men's lives; some such account as he would send to his kindred from a distant land; for if he has lived sincerely, it must have been in a distant land to me. Perhaps these pages are more particularly addressed to poor students. As for the rest of my readers, they will accept such portions as apply to them. I trust that none will stretch the seams in putting on the coat, for it may do good service to him whom it fits.”
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